Wednesday, December 17, 2008

It's A Really Great Song, But I Wouldn't Like It, or, An Open Letter, or, Ways to Antagonize Your Audience

Dear Sir or Madame Whose Blog I Occasion,

Why do you people think you have better taste in music than I do?

I've got news for you. You don't.

Believe it or not, I don't actually want to listen to your music while reading your blog. Not now. Not ever. I'd rather listen to a) the quiet whir of the heater under my desk, b) my own music, c) that "It's Delilah" crap 24-7, d) a dentist's drill, or e) basically ANYTHING other than your particular music. It's amazing how opposite our taste in music clearly is. I won't begrudge you treating yourself to that slop, but it's like you are making me pay a tax with my ears for the privilege of viewing your blog. Maybe it's just my fiscally conservative upbringing, but I just don't think the public will tolerate this particular type of taxation much longer. So, please, if you love our great country, get rid of those auto-play songs!

Now, as most reasonable people have discovered, providing people with music they can choose to listen to whilst perusing your blog is acceptable webehaviour. But removing my choice in the matter? Forcing me to listen to your music, which invariably stinks wore that tarry-black-red-brown gunk that comes out of someones nose 2 weeks after sinus surgery, while my browser is aimed at your blog? That sounds awfully similar to communism, and smells worse than the Tijuana dump. Hopefully people come to their senses quicker than Castro. Because communism kills, people. Communism kills.



1 comment:

Scott & Natalie said...

I've always wanted to vent about the stupid music on people's blogs! Thank you for doing it for me! It is seriously a huge pet peeve of mine.